noddeat

Impressed by the joke about elephants in the refrigerator, I've googled the internet to find if there are more jokes about elephants. And yep, I've found an entry in Wikipedia entitled “Elephant joke”: Here go some examples:

Q: How do elephants communicate?
A: They talk on the elephone.
Q: Who weighs 6000 pounds and wears glass slippers?
A: Cinderelephant
Q: Wha't big and grey and can fly straight up?
A: An elecopter.
Q: What do elephants do for entertainment?
A: Watch elevision.

Q: How do you tell if there is an elephant in your refrigerator?
A: Look for his footprints in the cheesecake.
Q: How do you tell if there are two elephants in your refrigerator?
A: Look for two sets of footprints side by side.
Q: How do you tell if there are three elephants in your refrigerator?
A: The door won't close.
Q: How many giraffes will fit in the refrigerator?
A: None: there are already too many elephants in there.

Q: How do you get an elephant into a Volkswagon Beetle?
A: Open the door, insert elephant, close door.
Q: How do you get 4 elephants in a Volkswagon?
A: Two in the front and two in the back
Q: How do you know if an elephant is visiting your house?
A: There is a Volkswagon parked outside with 3 elephants in it.

Q: How do you get 8 elephants in a refrigerator?
A: Put 4 elephants in one Volkswagon, put four elephants in another Volkswagon, and put the two Volkswagons in the refrigerator.
Q: But two Volkswagons won't fit in a refrigerator.
A: There were two elephants in there, and a Volkswagon isn't as big as an elephant!

Q: How do you make an elephant float?
A: With two scoops of ice-cream, a bottle of cream soda, and an elephant.

Q: Why are elephants large, grey, and wrinkled?
A: Because if they were small, white, and smooth they would be aspirins.

Q: Why did the elephant wear dark sunglasses?
A: So he wouldn't be recognized.
Q: What did Tarzan say when the elephant came up over the hill?
A: Nothing. He didn't recognize the elephant because he was wearing dark sunglasses.

Q: What did the cat say to the elephant?
A: Meow.

Q: Why do elephants wear red toenail polish?
A: Oops, sorry, no Polish jokes allowed.
Q: Why do elephants paint their toenails red?
A: So they can hide in the strawberry patch.
Q: But there aren't any elephants in the strawberry patch!
A: See, their camoflauge is working.

Q: How do you get an elephant to the top of an oak tree?
A: Plant an acorn under him and wait 50 years.
Q: What if I don't want to wait 50 years?
A: Put a parachute on the elephant and drop him from an elecopter.
Q: How do you get an elephant down from an oak tree?
A: Tell him to sit on a leaf and wait until autumn.
Q: Why are alligators long and flat?
A: They must have gotten too close to the oak tree.

Q: What's the difference between an African elephant and an Indian elephant?
A: About 3000 miles.
Q: What's the difference between an elephant and a flea?
A: An elephant can have fleas, but a flea can't have elephants.
Q: What's the difference between an elephant and an egg?
A: If you don't know, I hope you don't do the grocery shopping!

Q: Why did the elephant cross the road?
A: It was the chicken's day off.
Q: Why did the Frenchman sprinkle salt on the road?
A: To keep elephants away.
Q: But there are no elephants in France.
A: See, it's working!

Q: What do you do with a blue elephant?
A: Cheer him up.

Q: Where is the best place to see a herd of charging elephants?
A: On elevision.
Q: How do you keep an elephant from charging?
A: Take away his credit cards.

Q: What did the Dallas chief of police say when the elephant walked into the police station?
A: Nothing! He didn't notice.

Q: How do you shoot a blue elephant?
A: With a blue elephant gun.
Q: How do you shoot a yellow elephant?
A: Have you ever seen a yellow elephant?
Q: How do you shoot a red elephant?
A: Hold his trunk shut until he turns blue, and then shoot him with the blue elephant gun.

Q: What do elephants have that nothing else has?
A: Baby elephants.

Q: What is gray, has four legs, and a trunk?
A: A mouse going on vacation.
Q: What is brown, has four legs, and a trunk?
A: A mouse coming back from vacation.
Q: What has eight legs, two trunks, four eyes, and two tails?
A: Two elephants.

Q: Why is an elephant big, grey and wrinkly?
A: Because if it was small, white and hard it would be an aspirin.
Q: Why are golf balls small and white?
A: Because if they were big and grey they would be elephants.

Q: What's the difference between an elephant and a plum?
A: Their color.
Q: What did Tarzan say to Jane when he saw the elephants coming?
A: Here come the elephants.
Q: What did Jane say to Tarzan when she saw the elephants coming?
A: Here come the plums; she was color blind.